God has united you with Christ Jesus. For our benefit God made him to be wisdom itself. Christ made us right with God; he made us pure and holy, and he freed us from sin. 1 Corinthians 1:30 (NLT)
Ok, so for about most of my life I have had an issue with being transparent and always wondered how others could considering their past. For most of my childhood I have been considered “Ms Goody Two Shoes”. In the eyes of everyone else, it seemed as if I had never done any wrong and was the perfect daughter, student, friend, and person in general. Umm WRONG! Unfortunately, I took that to heart and tried to please people. Even if I did wrong, I would try to put on a front as if I had not.
It had not been until recently (last year) that I begin to realize that my true worth and value is not based on people’s opinions of me…but its based on what God says about me. Trying to please people can easily get you lying to cover up something you have done and then you have to keep piling more lies in order to keep up the image. I have realized that it is not worth it!
TRANSPARENT MOMENT: One of the major issues I had to deal with was sexual purity. Unfortunately, I did not wait until marriage and afterwards I felt worthless. (Exactly how our enemy Satan wants us to feel). I felt that God could not forgive me for sinning against Him, even though I would pray and ask for forgiveness. Basically, what I was doing was telling God that I did not believe that His only Son Jesus really did die to cover all our sins and take all our diseases away so we can live eternally. I did not see my value in Christ, I saw it in human’s standards. I felt like a failure because sexual purity was one area of my life that I was very adamant about before colllege. I really did want to save myself for my husband, yet chose to hang around the wrong people in college. True statement: “Birds of a feather flock together”. I begin to act like those around me instead of showing them the Christ that I thought lived inside of me. (Another blog coming soon regarding my childhood and Christianity!!!) So if you are a Christian…guard your heart!! Let go of toxic friendships/relationships. Be a LIGHT in this dark world. DO NOT be like the world!
For years I allowed satan to plant negative thougths in my mind about myself and I begin to belive them. (Examples: YOu’re worthless, Who would want you now, You’ll never be happy. You’ll never get married, etc). Those thoughts led me to a relationship in my past that should have never been, but it happened and now I’m not ashamed to recognize that. (Another blog coming about this too 🙂 ) But do you see how those were definite lies?! I am now married to someone who loves me and knows my worth…to someone who loves Christ! (I almost missed THE ONE because of the lies I was believing from satan).
I commend those who have written books and started organizations because they chose to be TRANSPARENT about their pasts to help others and to keep others from making the same mistakes they have. We all have made mistakes and may not be proud of them, but did you know that God can turn your mess into a blessing for someone else, if you allow Him to? Honestly, it has been women that I have followed on twitter and heard their stories and see what God is doing in their lives now. They have been an inspiration to me to let go of my past and use it to help others. No need to be ashamed…it happened…move on!
So let’s all be TRANSPARENT and stop focusing on our selfishness! Let’s be selfless and use our past as testimonies to others because you will never know who you may help or be a blessing to just by being honest. Also when you are transparent, the enemy does not have something to hold over your head to make you feel worthless. Remember: satan wants you to live in bondage. He does not want you to know your worth because he knows what we are capable of becoming when we truly give our lives to Christ. Let’s believe what God says about us…not some fallen angel!
Much love, Carol
Shout outs to the following for sharing their testimonies and blessings others because of their past: